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Ask Claire; Should mum's come on hens?

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This week’s query is one we can all relate to – should mum’s come on hens? Susan wrote in with an all too common dilemma.

“Hi Claire, Very stressed out. I'm bridesmaid for my friend and we are going to Galway. The other night I was in her house and the way her Mum was talking, I'm pretty sure she thinks she is coming on the hen. She was asking what we should wear and are there are plans for getting there yet. The bride def doesn't want her there. But I know she'd be really upset if she thought her Mum wanted to come and would be upset if she couldn't. I don't know what to do. Should I tell the bride and risk upsetting her or should I tell her Mum it's for friends only (which would really upset her). I'm so stressed over it. Please help!”

Claire’s Advice;
First things first, when it comes to having the mother of the bride at the hen party that decision is completely up to the bride. If you are absolutely positive that she doesn’t want her mam there than there is a way to get around it to make sure everyone is happy.

What I advise is you explain reasonably that the hen party won’t be her scene and I’m sure she’ll understand. She’s probably going through a whirlwind of emotions right now, her daughter is getting married so I’m sure she doesn’t want to miss a thing.

Instead of having her at the hen party why not organise a bridal shower? Invite all the ‘older’ female relatives that couldn’t come to the hen and the bride’s closest friends.

Afternoon tea, brunch or a nice dinner will work perfectly! The main thing to remember is the hen party should be all about the bride if you keep this in mind everything will run smoothly!

If you have hen queries, Ask Claire at

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Claire Hutchings
Claire is our bubbly problem-solver! Tackling hen dilemmas with a grin and turning every hen hiccup into a hoot! When she's not working away in the office Claire loves to be out on the pitch playing football and rugby.
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